Tiffany Goyer, MA, RYT, merges her vast education and experience as a life Coach, Therapist, Counselor, Practitioner of Neuro-Emotional Technique (NET) and study of Yoga therapy to bring together a wealth of healing modalities to synchronize the body, mind and spirit.
Do you find yourself complaining about all the things going wrong in your life, and then have to remind yourself of this too? If so you are in good company. It's not because you are a negative Nelly. No, it's your brain doing it's job to keep you safe, but it hasn't quite adapted to live outside the cave yet.
1. Coachee: You said the goal is not to feel good all of the time?
Me: Right. Our circumstances are not always going to be pleasant and that’s ok. Often we think we have to change our circumstance to feel better, but that is not the point. We can change how we’re thinking about our circumstances and that will change how we’re feeling, reacting and what results we’re creating for ourselves in that circumstance.
You might be wondering, when you finally feel comfortable at something (work, play, life), why are you not as satisfied as you expected?
Our comfort zones. They are so cozy. So reassuring. So stable. Until they’re not. Until our insistence on staying in our comfort zone, usually so well meaning, actually leads to a narrowing of our life to such an extent that we feel “trapped” or “stuck” versus comfortable and good.
"Setbacks" are just "Speed bumps" on the road to change. Totally normal!
Get familiar with the way you think about your setbacks and your whole life can change. Sounds dramatic, but it's true!
So listen – anytime you’re trying to make a change in your life you’re going to experience what feels like setbacks. And a lot of the time we tell ourselves that a “setback” means we can’t do it, or it’s not going to work.
“So many of our dreams at first seem impossible, then they seem improbable, and then, when we summon the will, they soon become inevitable.” — Christopher Reeve
It’s important for us to believe in things we have no past evidence to support us believing in.
Our thoughts shape our reality. So if we continue to think what we’ve always thought, we’re going to produce what we’ve always produced. I’ve read this a thousand times before. But you know when you have that moment where you hear something and then that moment when you REALLY HEAR something.
What if there was one thing you could do right now for self-care that would greatly improve your mental, physical & spiritual health, and you don't even have to move from where you are or stop what you are doing? Well there is...
You can stop mentally beating yourself up and feeling guilty for not sticking to your self-care routine? Wait a minute, what?
Our brains are biologically wired for survival. When we lived more primitive lives, think caveman cavewoman, this was very helpful in ensuring we were alert to danger and ready to act. In today’s world we don’t need our brains to be constantly scanning for life-threatening dangers. But our brain hasn’t gotten that message. It wants us to stay in the cave. It’s committed to keeping us safe. And that means sometimes we can over think things and put ourselves in a Fight or Flight or Freeze Response over scenarios that are not happening and likely aren’t ever going to happen.
I think there’s no such thing as “right” decision. The recovering perfectionist in me wants to believe there is. That with enough time, research, assessing and over thinking I can make sure that I make the most right decisions I can.
And the deal is I’m slowly, learning to re-define how I think about a “right” decision. Of course I want to be aligned with my integrity and spirit.
A mini session is your opportunity to spend some one-on-one time with me talking about YOU exclusively.
How often do we get to talk for 30 minutes straight to a caring, experienced professional, who will listen and coach us in an unbiased way... that our friends and family just can't provide (no matter how much they care)? Probably never. Not only that, but I'll send you on your way with the secret to lasting empowerment. AND a tool you can use right away with no strings attached and no weird salesy conversation.
Are you too busy to make Resolutions? Tried them and they haven’t worked for you? Then you are like most of the busy women I work with. Don’t stop reading; there is nothing wrong with you, I promise. Sometimes we just need to try a new and fun approach and stop beating ourselves up.
Come with me...
I’m a huge proponent of intentions and goal setting. It works for me and I’ve seen it change my amazing clients’ lives in massive ways. It’s a necessary process for a flourishing, purposeful, joyful life. That sounds good, right? I want what she’s having please. But how? Read on…
I think we resist making priorities clear because we think the act of deciding which thing is more important than another will be difficult. So we avoid the difficult conversation, in this case with ourselves. We avoid setting our priorities and, by default, everything is important and our over-worked, busy lives come out of this.
We tell ourselves we don’t get to choose our priorities. We have to work. We have to take care of our family. We have to pay the bills. Even within our “have to’s” we have a choice. So if we’re not choosing our priorities, who is?
I believe every woman has the right to feel irresistible confidence, and remember and believe that anything is possible for her life. After all, that's the way dreams and goals become a reality. But we have to get past the confusion to identify, pursue and achieve those desires.
If we stay in confusion, we stay stuck. We let life happen to us, instead of creating on purpose what we actually want.
People always ask me what Find Your Flourish means. It means that you feel irresistible to yourself and you are living the life of your dreams. That may sound silly, or worse conceited, impossible, or undeserving but it's not... Simple put when you feel irresistible to yourself you are in a state of allowing your true nature to shine though all aspects of your life. Keep reading to see what that looks like...
If you're anything like I used to be, you won't like the sound of the word constraint. I'm gonna change your mind!
Every Thursday morning I go to my podcast feed looking forward to the next bit of wisdom I’m going to receive from one of my favorite coaches. Several months ago, I opened my feed to a podcast called “constraint”. And I closed my app and didn’t listen.
It started out innocently enough. I am an ambitious woman. Hey, don't judge, ambition gets a bad wrap. All it means is the desire to do or achieve something, typically requiring determination and hard work. So, if you are reading this, chances are you are an ambitious woman too. For me what that means is, once I set my mind to something I make it happen. I love that about myself. However, this strength has also been one of my greatest weaknesses. Interesting how perceived weaknesses are just strengths over used.
Guest post by Lisa Franzino! I am so honored that one of the ah-mazing women from the Find Your Flourish France Retreat 2015 took time out to share her experience! Thank you so much Lisa! Your passion for life and love touched us all...
Getting Out of a Rut!
In the summer of last year, I was feeling like I was in a serious rut. I had recently completed a Raw Chef training and knew I wanted to help people but I wasn’t sure how. I was feeling very overwhelmed by my indecision and all of my options were creating a kind of paralysis. The invitation to join the Find your Flourish retreat in France came at just the right time. The week of the retreat along with some extra “me time” that bookended the trip allowed me to step out my own inner turmoil and get down to the basics of what I was/am really after: contentment, purpose, connection with others and confidence to do whatever I choose.
Deciding to Retreat
The retreat was set in a comfortable villa perched atop the hills of Nice. All we needed was our clothes and personal affects and everything else was taken care of. That first evening, as the other women showed up, we all got to know each other. There was a nice group of strong, accomplished women — all on a similar path to find direction, connection and “flourish”! It was easy to see right away that we would form a deep connection with each other throughout the course of the retreat.
Our days started off with a meditation, a delicious but light breakfast and then Tiffany led us in some Kundalini yoga exercises. Everyone was at a different level of fitness from yoga newbie to yoga teacher (I am a Bikram instructor) and the Kundalini was accessible and beneficial to us all. We then had “workshop” time where Tiffany facilitated a discussion around a theme and shared tools with us to help overcome, discover and unlock. These sessions were followed by an [at least] three course meal made by our own private chef, Magali. The afternoons were filled with exploring the French Riviera and the evenings with more delicious food, conversation and bonding with our new fast friends.
My time in France taught me so many things, but the greatest life lesson I took away is that JOY is truly the purpose of life… Does this sound radical? It doesn’t have to be, but it may require some belief and attitude changes, which are not always easy, but always possible!
What if you decided to live your life as if the purpose of it was to experience as much joy as possible? What would you be doing differently, what would stay the same? What would it look like if your wildest dreams came true? Share your posts bellow.
I recently returned to Los Angeles after living in the French Riviera as an expat for two glorious months. Some would argue that this is a wild dream, but I created this opportunity for myself because I decided to take my own pleasure seriously. Give yourself permission to dream… My time there started by leading a women’s mind-body-spirit retreat that was so transformational it blew my mind. I planned to stay in the South of France after the retreat so I could experience all that French culture had to teach me, which was a lot.... As a psychotherapist and life coach who integrates yoga therapy, I am fortunate because with modern technology I can pretty much do my mentoring, therapy, and counseling work from anywhere in the world, and remain connected to my clients that come from around the globe.
I've identified the 5 most common fears that women face when they consider traveling. Watch this video and see if you identify.
Do you have some of these fears? What would your best friend tell you to do if you told her you were considering going on a dream trip, or retreat? I have a feeling she would probably tell you to go. So why is it that we do not give ourselves this same permission? Don't let fears stop you from traveling, life is too short, and there are way too many benefits to traveling. You are worth it. Your self-care is worth it. Your transformation is worth it! And all of this and more could be awaiting you in France.
You are invited to journey with me and a fabulous group of like-minded women to the South of France. The Find Your Flourish France Retreat is 9/27/15-10/3/15. Come find your Flourish and remember that anything is possible.
