Saying No to the “New Me” in the New Year

We truly torture ourselves this time of year. We make lists of ways we want to change and go into attack mode.  

We try desperately to drop a few clothing sizes.

 

We’d like to replace our clunker car.

 

We want to find a new lover.

 

It’s out with the old, and in with the new! We seek out new hair, clothes, friends, jobs, and bodies. We join yoga studios, sign-up for book clubs, and finally get on a Peloton® bike. We make vows to make everything old new again. 

But at what cost?  

Feeling like SHIT! 

No part of us seems good enough. We feel progressively worse about ourselves, while strategizing how to transform everything—ALL AT ONCE. 

But this is a true denial of where we’ve been and how much there is to be proud of and celebrate. No amount of self-abuse is going to get you where you want to be… 

…and—newsflash—there’s nothing wrong with the “old” you! 

That’s why we should start with simple self-love and self-appreciation. We can slow down, look back, and see what has gone right in our lives, instead of nit-picking what we think went wrong. 

What made you most proud last year?

 

Can you identify your favorite memory from 2019?

 

In what ways was 2019 an improvement over 2018?

 

For extra credit, take some time to list 20 things you loved about or accomplished in 2019. If you can’t think of them all at once, keep a running list. 

When you start to feel down on yourself, or like you need to radically change your life, look over the list and shower yourself with self-love. 

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The “old you” is wonderful—and deeply appreciating that fact can help you evolve into the new. 


This week in a mini session I helped Nadia (we’ll call her for confidentiality purposes) understand 3 of the most important things she could do to focus on what really matters this year, and drop everything that she was beating herself up for not doing last year.  

If you are struggling with this too, do you see an upside in berating yourself for what you didn’t accomplish? I’m here to tell you there is no upside, it might feel like it motivates you to do better, but it actually does the opposite.  

Take a moment to honor what you did do last year. Now, focus on what you want to do this year, maybe it’s the same as last year, maybe it’s different. But don’t try the same old tactics that didn’t get you the results you truly wanted in your life. Jump on a mini session and let a pro coach like myself help you, you deserve it. xx